For Quips in 140 Characters:

For pithy remarks of any sort (poetry included) please tweet @clumsyquips. The best will be featured on our twitter feed, and our homepage.

For Short Fiction:

Short stories should ideally max out at about 1,500 words, though we’re willing to consider some that inch in around the 2,000 mark. There are no hard and fast guidelines as to what we publish, though we have a predilection for particularly poetic prose, and anything that mentions famous writers of yore.

Please send all short fiction submissions to:

For Poetry:

Poems of any modest length (less than 1000 words) are welcome. Please format as you would like your poem to appear on the site. All poetry submissions should be sent to:

For Essays:

Essays can be on any subject, but should ring in at a maximum of 2000 words. While first person shock and awe essays will be considered, be warned, we lean more towards observational, wise, and witty words.

All essays should be submitted to:


Humor quips can be submitted in almost any format—haiku, list, timely observation—so long as they’re funny, and under 1000 words long. Three lists, or haikus may be submitted simultaneously, though all others must be submitted one at a time. Send all humor quips to:

Simultaneous submission:

Please just send one piece of writing at a time, unless it is a list or haiku (see above). Responses will be sent out within three weeks, after which you can turn around and submit a new piece of writing immediately.


All submitted quips should start like this:

Story Title

Your Name

Phone Number

Email Twitter or Instagram Handle


You retain the rights to anything you write.